john 14:1-4

"don't let your hearts be troubled. trust in God, and trust also in me. there is more than enough room in my father's home. if this were not so, would i have told you that i am going to prepare a place for you? when everything is ready, i will come and get you, so that you will always be with me where i am. and you know the way to where i am going".






cutest verse of my life. Jesus is such a sweetheart.

hold on, we're going the long way.

life was not made to be easy.

believe it or not, life is actually about knowing Jesus, living for Him & having a right relationship with Him.

and whether we get to that point by marvelling at His creations and realising there must be something bigger, by being invited to a church service by a friend or through to being in your darkest hour when you need a miracle and you cry out to Him.

i believe at some stage in life, we all get to that point, where we get the opportunity to know Jesus.

some take it, some don't.

i personally chose to take that opportunity nearly three years ago. for me it wasn't one of those incredible stories. i got invited to church by my bestfriend, i wasn't in a real great place or heading in a great direction. and i didn't really know what i was doing to be honest, i just knew that i was home and that Jesus could help me.

but like i said, i soon realised it's not all happy-go-lucky once you become a christian, because actually life was not made to be easy. it's an every day battle, it's not an easy journey, and it has a lot of trials.
but without trials, we would never have the chance to overcome and come out stronger.

in ps gillian's message this morning she talked about how mark 11 says that through Jesus we have the power to move mountains. but there's an appointed time for it to move and sometimes God doesn't want us to move the mountains, he wants us to take the long way around them, because on that journey there's an incredible lesson to be learnt.

pain is temporary, where as God's promises are eternal. and there is an appointed time for everything. that's something really important that we have to hold on to and remember.

He just wants us to not give up. to hold on. imagine if when Jesus was on the cross, if he was like 'oh actually God, it's too hard, i give up'.

holding on doesn't mean having it all together, clearly. when Jesus was being tortured and hung on the cross, i don't think he would have had it all together. but he was like 'God your will be done, not mine' and he knew there was a great purpose behind it. and in genesis when Jacob wrestled with God and refused to let go. he had his hip wrenched out of place...i'm pretty sure he didn't have it all together either, but he held on because he knew he was going to get blessing out of it.

and that's what's meant by taking the long way around - holding on.

it's tedious, it's hard, and sometimes seems hopeless. but that's when it's even more crucial to hold on to God's word and His promises.

He is always faithful. He always loves. He never leaves and never fails.

greater things.

when you pray for something, be purposeful with your prayers. God answers them.

so often we ask God for his will to be done and not ours. we ask for opportunities to do what he's appointed us to do. and so often what we forget is that his plans for us are bigger than what we could ever imagine, they are beyond our natural strength & ability. so when he actually answers our prayers and tells us to go out and preach to all the world, or to save our highschools, or even just to go evangelise to someone, it seems like such a huge and scary task. and subconsciously we're like 'oh okay, well if that's your will and your plans, then maybe i don't want them after all. i can't do that, i think i'll just stick with my will, it's a lot more comfortable'.

and the devil always uses that to try and rob us of our potential and of God's promises/call on our life. he belittles us with fear and 'common sense' and tricks us into living an average, mundane life. it's an everyday battle that we face, and we actually have to claim power and victory over our thought life and over the devil. because you know what, God doesn't call us to live comfortable lives, he has much bigger plans for us.

we're called and appointed for such a time as this, we're called to step out and make a difference in this world. to reach a hurting generation in desperate need of God's love.

and if people would just grasp that, maybe just maybe, something great could happen.

#jmt'11

we leave on monday!!!

so not including today, that's like 3 days away. ohmygosh.

working on my message.

it's called "you're not called to swim with the tide, but to walk on water".

yeah, pretty pumped about it.

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lord; i need you.

i am so flippin sick of negative neil's. srsly.

'that's not possible' or 'you can't do it' ... always seeing the glass half empty.

but tell me this, why can't you do it? name me one good reason that you cannot achieve anything you set out to do!!!

because last time i checked, we had a God on our side who made & conquered the world. and last and last time i checked, his only desire was to bless us and love on us. and last time i checked, my bible told me we could do all things through Him who strengthens us. and last time i flippin checked nothing was too hard for him.

it just takes complete faith in God. faith is like praying for something you want as if you already had it, not begging God, not being arrogant in expecting it, but having this peace and complete trust & confidence that He will come through for you.

i'm being tested, but i'm hanging on with everything i've got. learning to lean and fully depend on Him.

matthew 7:7&8

⁷ “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. ⁸ For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.

she's a woman of the spirit;

hear God's voice & speak it.

beautiful you.

do you believe and trust in the word of God?
do you believe that he created the heavens and the earth perfectly in all there complex detail?
so then, do you believe that he created you beautifully and wonderfully in His own image?

God doesn't make mistakes. and you think if he made something as amazing and complex as this world, he could have easily and perfectly made something as small and beautiful as you?

it breaks my heart to see some girls that don't understand their value and don't respect themselves. women are God's gift to men. eve was made for adam, and like eve, i believe we are all perfectly created for someone. someone, not everyone.

i think when you get a revelation of God, you understand and get a better revelation of who you are/were created to be. when you get revelation of Him you begin to understand the love He has for you. that He created you as his special posession and that He has ordained you. that you are a gift and an answer, not a problem. and that you are fearfully and wonderfully made in His image.

so in saying that: though, we are all made in His image, we are all different. each one of us is perfectly designed and hand crafted to portray different characteristics of God. so pretty much when you try to be like somebody else or put yourself down, you're insulting God and telling Him you don't ike Him and what He has created. convicting.

then when you understand who you are/were created to be, you start to walk in all that God has for you and you start to respect yourself more. you clothe yourself with strength and dignity and put on a garment of praise & a robe of righteousness. you don't go after every guy that you see because you understand what true love is and that it is patient and you were created for someone, but it will happen all in God's timing. and you also realise that from your relationship with God flows all other relationships, so if you're relationship with Him is not great, you're definitely not ready for any other relationship.

there's nothing more attractive than a woman who is madly in love with God and is on fire for Him.

...there is a whole generation of girls out there who need to know that. who need to know Jesus.
who need someone to tell them about Jesus.

i'll be that someone.

shift.

this weekend has been incredible, truly and absolutely beautiful. I don't even really know how to describe how good it was.

lol this is one of those post conference blogs where you try to explain the greatness of God and all He has done in your life over this past weekend,

but ends up failing hard out because putting it into words is proving a little difficult.

i went in believing for two things, which kind of go hand in hand really

- for God to remove this feeling of hopelessness

that had been lingering over my life lately,

and for confirmation of my future, what He wants me to do.

so first few sessions He was really just stirring my spirit,

like i could feel the Holy Spirit moving within me, preparing me,

like an intense anticipation/excitement.

and in the friday avo youth stream when levi opened the altar

to touch Jesus' hem and to get your moment, i went up and encountered God.

got prophesied over it was mean, could not have come at a better time,

shot God.

but He also just reminded me of what it means to be his daughter

- of what it means to be his princess

and everything that comes with that.

He told me i need to stop stumbling my way through life on accident

and stop living in the shadow of other people, but put purpose into my step

and run the race right, run it for Him, shining His light.

also thinking i know what He wants me to do with my life now too.

kind of along the lines of what i wanted to do, yet completely different

- which makes no sense to you, but complete sense to me.

i have to set all my dreams and desires aside though,

and set my heart on fire for His cause and His path.

should be interesting, but so so so great.

big plans, big purpose, big God.

and to top off an already beautiful weekend,

it's snowing!

pretty much just in awe of how wonderful our God is.

so stunning.

and it's my birthday tomorrow,

huuuullloooo.

fabulous.

it's been a whiile since i've done a decent blog about something interesting.

i hate the fact that everytime we walk into a room and see someone, we unintentionally judge them because of our human nature. we see the world in patterns, and feel the need to be able to read people. so we compare their likeness with other people and stereotype them into groups, disregarding the fact that each is their own unique individual.

i try my hardest not to. why do i have to be so...human.
sometimes i just have to stop and remind myself, that even though they might be doing drugs or stealing, or whatever; i am no better than them. sin is sin, it's all as bad as each other and
we all do it.

half way through the year already.
two thirds of the way through the school year though; hallelujah. holidays at the end of this week. loving life.
been having a lot of people asking me what i want to do when i leave school lately. i'm kinda like, i haven't even started ncea yet and you're already asking me?!
srsly.
these next few years are gonna go really quick though,
and i'll be out of school before i know it.

speaking of school, got my mid year report today. i probably shouldn't be so hard on myself, because it's actually a really good report, but it's not perfect.

trusting means making yourself vulnerable for the sake of someone else; it's uncomfortable, but stepping out of your comfort zone is rewarding.

God's hand is a good hand to hold. he holds you up when you're not strong. he always leads you down the right path. he never lets go.

eeeee

loling at how unattractive this photo is.



feeling really good. last night was great. potential best night.
i have a tendancy to freak myself out heaps before i go on stage, then i get up there and i'm sweet, but then come off shaking. it's great, i love it.
first time praying in prayer meeting, first time preaching.
and i'm feeling on top of the world.

freeeeaking.

2G night on friday.
i'm preaching.

sharing my testimony at church today.
slash a minute and a half version of my testimony.
low key freaking. actually, it's really not that low key.

the heeeck.

i hate science. science & i just don't get a long. kinda like a cat & mouse. i'm all like 'hey, i'll try my hardest to get you because i want to do well' and it's all like 'fail. i'm going to confuse the heck out of you & ruin your life'. stretch...maybe.
we're starting to learn about evoloution now. and there's always the classic anti's in the class... 'God's not real, blahblahblah' ...and it makes me so mad. the ghetto side of me is like, you should go smack them in the face...with a shovel.
and then the sane side of me is like, hayley is patient, hayley is kind, hayley is not easily angered, etc.
i'm kinda like, why would you choose to trust in science and be so anti God. a lot of science is theory, it gives you no hope or purpose & it says that we evolved from smelly animals. why would you trust in that, when you could trust in God. who gives you purpose that you were perfectly created for such a time as this, hope for a future & a meaning for life. why.

it's like, don't judge me for believing in God when you haven't even experienced it. i've been in your shoes.
rantrantrantrantrant. i'm just really passionate about that. ha.


i'd like to be a jellyfish. that would be nice.

search my heart.

i can't lead you if you won't take my hand.

we need to take God's hand for him to lead us, otherwise it's just following and not actually going on the journey with Him. i guess if he's got your hand, there's always that support there beside you to catch you when you fall. but not only that, if you've got His hands you are intimate with Him, you have a close relationship, and a personal link to His thoughts.

He has his arms open wide to us, so we need to have ours open wide to Him.

life with God; is life that's good.

i honestly don't know how people could have babies, or look at the night sky, and not believe in God. to have something as beautiful and detailed as a baby grow inside of you, to have life come from you. or to see the delicate craftmanship of the stars on a clear night..and think that maybe, just maybe it wasn't by accident, but rather by a creator who so perfectly designed it.

that used to be me. i didn't believe in God once. it occurred to me that maybe the people like me couldn't find God, for the same reason that a thief cannot find a policeman.
they weren't looking, they were running away.

break my heart for the things that break Yours.

listen. focus.

i will rise, when He calls my name

no more sorrow, no more pain

i will rise, on eagles wings

before my God, fall on my knees

and rise.

generally specific.

a great life is not an easy life. it's a life that makes a difference.

been really challenged this weekend. good.

a breath of fresh air.

i'm trying to figure out which would be worse ;
being born with sight & being able to experience it, then losing it ..
or being born blind & not even knowing..

looking up.

positive. faith. people. confidence. love. Jesus. highschool. grow. future. life. trust. fresh. unity. vision. adventure. journey. expectant. pray. flourish. give. connection. hopeful.

i heard your heart say.

this photo makes me smile. a lot.

love is a crazy thing.

God chooses to love us, though we have done nothing to deserve it.

He is the only one who has the right to judge us for all the bad things that we do, yet he doesn't.

when we deserve judgement, he gives us grace.

"but he said to me, 'my grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' therefore i will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me." - 2 corinthians 12:9.

this is a great scripture. because actually, what we think are flaws & imperfections, were perfectly created for God's glory.

you were created perfect :)

that's an encouraging thought, ha.

1 corinthians 13:4-7

Love is patient, Love is kind.
It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no records of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects, always trusts, always perserveres.

...

Hayley is patient, Hayley is kind.
She does not envy, she does not boast, she is not proud.
She is not rude, she is not self-seeking, she is not easily angered, she keeps no record of wrongs.
Hayley does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
She always protects, always trusts, always perserveres.


...convicting...

hmm..

spent the day with tee today ; i miss her.

at the moment God's been playing something on my heart that i'm not too happy about. well, actually, it's not that i'm not happy about it, it's just that it's going to be hard.
buuut ; no matter how hard the process is, the promise is so worth it! funtimes.

kiaora Jesus. i love you. & life.

know my mind

it's amazing how God specifically places certain people, things, obstacles, situations, in our life. to help us, to show us, to teach us, to grow us. i am thankful.

it's fun to look back and find what made you first drawn to a person. why you first became friends. "that is why you cannot love two people the same. it simply is not possible. you love each person differently because of who they are and the uniqueness they draw out of you" - the shack. i think this is a great quote.
jessica greer is someone i am very blessed to have in my life. i enjoy her company. slash running into her at school & getting caught up in conversation. she gives great hugs. and generally is just a peaceful person to be around- that probably sounds a bit weird, but i mean in a way where there's a sense of trust, and it's just comfortable. she's a great sister, and whether she believes it or not, she's amazing!

this is probably going to sound real extreme, but i was thinking today. i'd like to be able to feel other peoples pain, but not be affected by it. if you get what i mean. not in an emo way, but i think it'd be so much easier to help someone- and you'd be more compelled to do something about it- if you experience what they're going through. sort of like being able to read someones thoughts ; but with emotions.

life left to live.

i think sometimes the best thing to do is ; just LET IT GO.

slash, always.

i find that a bit of a hard concept sometimes. when God's like 'let it go' and i'm like 'but..but..buu' and he's like 'just let it go. it's what's best'.

we try to hold on to things to find security in & give us justification for our actions.

e.g. 'they hurt me, so i'm depressed & i can't forgive them..' our being sad is justified by the fact that someone hurt us, and we hold onto it because it gives us security that we're doing the right thing.

when really, all it's doing is confining us to the walls we've built up around ourselves, therefore limiting our potential & restricting us.

and all God wants us to do is let it go. forgive & forget. move on.

it's so hard, yet so simple.

today i was introduced to a new concept called, treasure hunting.

it's pretty much what the name says, but with a slight twist..

it's where you go on a mission & are lead by the Holy Spirit.

to people that God wants you to meet.

to talk with. pray with. tell them about God. etc.

i think it would be incredible. incredibly uncomfortable.

but so incredible.

God tests us, but not to an extent that we can't handle.

i'm glad that he always has a plan.

he's got the blueprint ; all we need to do is build according to the pattern.

life is so random sometimes. but great, none the less.

i'm reading The Shack at the moment. to say it's incredible, would probably be an understatement.

it's amazing how a book can change your life.

went into town today & hung with geo. haven't done that in a while.

it was nice.

i was thinking how we get so stuck in our comfort zone, that sometimes we become complacent. well, i do anyway, and it's bad. so i've made it my goal this year to never get comfortable. i figured that way, God can use me more & i can change people's lives more.

...but what if i get comfortable with being uncomfortable...

awkward.

i actually just love God, so so much!!!

all i know;

...is that in the end, it's all going to be okay.

lifelifelife.

1month. it's been a good month.

no facebook & blogger has been so good, you get so much more done with all the spare time you have.

what's been going on in my life in the past month?

i've had so many things come up.

one year bible has been incredible. it's amazing what God can do for you, just from reading your bible. slash in my case not for me.

cool story; i was casually just reading my bible, and my mums partners mother walks in to say goodbye to me. she asks me what i'm reading & i tell her it's my bible & explain to her how our church is doing the reading plan etc. she ends up telling me that she has believed in God all her life up until a couple of months ago, because she's going through a divorce, coming out of a 41year marriage. to cut a long story short, she said that seeing me reading my bible & going to church every week amazed her & that she was drawn to me & she was going to go back to church.

God works in funny ways.

He is giving me more opportunities. it's kind of scary to think he trusts me more than i trust myself.

i've gotten a lot closer to some of the kapiti girls, and found out that stepping out of my comfort zone is very rewarding. it's a bit scary when the only thing you can do is trust.

God uses small. he uses unlikely because then all glory has to go back to him, because people know it could never be done in the strength of something small. it's easier to build someone up, than break someone down.

i'm glad he chose me.

life is looking up :)

whatagod.

levi's bullrush analysis was incredible.
picture this. you're in a game of bullrush & God's the caller. you're all lined up & ready to go. you've got those people who are super keen to get called out, and then you've got the people who are a bit scared and sort of hiding themselves behind others. people are yelling out names for him to call, but he's not listening, he knows exactly who he wants to call out. God calls out your name for you to stand up. he calls you out not for who you are, but for who you will be. trust & you will be entrusted.


what a GOD.

nervous.

you know that excited feeling you get, where you're so flipping happy, but it borderline makes you feel like throwing up because you're freaking out. yeah.

it's like the feeling you get when you're about to jump off a cliff into a river. you have to take a leap of faith & it's a long way down, and you have to free fall for a bit. but you want to take the risk, because the water at the bottom is promising.



mmmm. God is good.

it pays to be specific :)









genesis 17:4

be still.

when the waves rise against me
and the wind tries to draw me away
i will stand on the mountains
safe in your arms
i will sing ;

only the best.

the thing that i love about God is ;

he's everything that i am not.

but in saying that, he's also everything that i am.

when i sin, he's gracious.

when i have nothing to give, he has everything

when i'm unfaithful, he remains faithful.

he's perfect.

it's good to know, that there's someone bigger than your understanding.

that you can fully trust in & rely on.

someone who is always there, all you have to do is listen.

perfect love.

i want the whole world to know.

when you're sitting on a hill, with great company, overlooking the ocean on one side, and the city lights on the other, watching the sun go down & the stars come up

you start to realise just how big & amazing our God is

it's flipping incredible to see, what seems so beautiful & intricite to us, is so simple to him.

He is perfect.